1^st.^[1]

                                                         22^d. July 1779
                                                         Thursday Morn^g.

      My dearest dearest dearest Friend,

      After ye promise I made of accounting for my conduct
especially in some particular instances which may perhaps have
struck you most, I now take up my Pen to unburden my whole Soul
to you.
      As to the petites attentions I may have lately shewn
one person, and which ʃhocked another person so much ye last Evening
we were together, I do aʃsure you as my friend they are not founded
upon any Penchant I might in particular have, but upon an old
joke which I explained to you at the time. Alas, my sweetest
Friend you are but too well acquainted, I say you are but too
well acquainted with the amiable object, on whom my whole
love, affection, and esteem centers, upon whom my whole happineʃs

---

                             2^d..

depends, and for whom I burn with ye. most vivid flame. Let
me not say that my paʃsion for this amiable object hads degenerated, if I instead of love
treating her with that violence of paʃsion, which I must ever feel,
I now treat her with that truly fraternal & tender affection, and that esteem
with which it becomes me to treat my dearest and firmest friend.
Such my ever amiable friend is the present situation of my
heart, search ever[y] inward corner of it, and look if there is a
secret, in the least more interesting which I have not told imparted to you
ask any questions of me I am ready prepared to answer every thing
concerning which you may poʃsibly enquire. When I gave that
ever dear kind, & obliging friend a Paper thnot long ago which
contained two verses, the verse of the last of which was,
je suivrai partout vos liens, I really meant what I said.
for had she hadnot made me a certain promise which I think
best not to mention as you well know, my intention really
was, not to have survived her loʃs a single instant, be it
in life or death, je suivrai partout ses liens. Continue

---

                             3^d..

my dearest ever amiable and kind friend, to treat me with
that open friendship, generosity of heart, and nobleneʃs
of mind which are innate in you, I conjure you, if not totally
to heal, at least to alleviate the pains I felel. Write me
an Answer if it is not inconvenient to you, which I entreat of you not to make too short,
blame me where I am worthy of it, and commend me
where I am worthy of praise. As we are now upon so free --- 
and disinterested a conduct, will my ever dearest friend,
excuse me if I say; I think you rather too apt to allow
the gloomy ʃhades of melancholy, to sieze too ʃtrong poʃseʃsion
of you, to let them prey too much upon yr. tender heart,
to let them dwell too much in yr. ʃpotleʃs mind, which
lets itself too easily be perceived throughout the whole
of yr. delicate frame. Was I to think that I was
cause of any part of that melancholy, I would immediately^[2]
abscond where no one should ever hear of me again, were not
I sensible, do I flatter myself, tell me I beseech of you,

---

                             4^th..

that it would rather increase than diminish yr. grief to hear
that him who was ever, is and ever shall be attached to you,
was no more. I very much admire the first Epistle of
the Eʃsay on man, which which you recommended to me
read from ye beginning to ye end over again. I admire
the beginning very much, as well as those tender lines
concerning which the innocent little lamb, whilst I
was reading them, & indeed the whole Epistle, I could
not help sighing to think how many great and wonderful
bleʃsings the Almighty has heaped upon Mankind, &
how unworthy we are all of us of them. I have now
to add what interests me most, that is my sweetest,
dearest, and best of friends, to entreat of you the continuance of that
disinterested affection and friendship with which you
have treated me all along, and which I shall cher
cherish to the end of my life, you will I am sure
have generosity enough I am sure I repeat it to grant my
request, as you must be sensible than in my situation

---

                             5^th..

in life I shall not have many even worldly friends, and not
one so open, generous, sympathizing as yourself, which alone must
render you dearer to me than the rest of the World together
Adieu my dearest, dearest, dearest Friend believe me
when I call you tout ce qui m'est chère au monde, these
are the never alterable sentiments of him whose greatest happineʃs
it will be to sign himself throughout ye whole of
his life.
                             Yr. ever sincerely affectionate Friend.
      P.S.
      I have forgot to make that request I told you I would make to you
that is to send me a lock of yr. hair envelopped in yr. answer, with which
I will immediately have something made to correspond with +toujours de même^[3]
I shall keep it in yr. absence as the representative of my dear friend & love
it accordingly. write whenever only it is convenient to yourself, & tell me
whether you hear that you are to make another sejour at —— soon or not.
Excuse my writing & the separate sheets I write upon as I am in an
amazing hurry. Adieu pour la seconde fois.
                             +tout ce qui m'est chère au monde.
The Carrier of this must call  ------  for
an answer at what time you settle with him. Adieu encore pour la troisième fois
                                                         tout ce qui m'est chère
                                                             au monde.

---

^[4]